BOredom jar:

 BOredom jar:

movie night

excercise together

fun: board/card games

puzzles/game night

comedy

hot topic debates

buisness planning

Bible study

read books together

learn new language

spa/massage/bath

karaoke

dance

write letters?

baking

learning... too late

Saturday

no its not.. it was just a holida because of ANZAC day

went hiking up the pigeon mountain

forgo badminton

worth it

having a baby is the start of the end of life as we know it

nothing teaches you more about sacrifice than having a kid

jarvis is in a rut,

not sure to continue the realtionship with tina or not

wonder what is it about girls

ah, she says she always bored

what do you want to do in life?

whats there to pursue?

my linkedin learning kinda expired, was using the ncr login previously, wonder why its not working anymore.. and netflix got kinda cracked down... sigh

not that i was using the learning to its fullest anyway

owh well

samsung dex

 So the samsung dex seems to be working out nicely

connected the phone to a J5 hub that has a hdmi and usb plug

just missing out the audio port, but wanted a 100w pass through

hmm maybe will just stick with the bluetooh fro sound

but this layoutseems to work nicely!

and it boots up fast unlike the old laptop

and very quite too

so yeah maby this is the new setup to write blog post on

20\4\2024 Saturday

why can't I type.

okay thats been fixed by closing and reoppenig the app

so i'm going to do this now with a phone instead of my laptop.

 but still typing with a physical keyboard.

sweettttt

yeah this should be less distracing

saturday

6.45 woke up by boi

7. feed milk

prepare. his fingers got caught in the door as i was geting stuff out of the closed for badminton. weather was rainy. wanted to go to the market or spend the days with family

8-10 playd badmiton. wythe, jarvis (confused about relationship with Tina, guys night out last night i missed it). big, zer, yoshi.. fun games

10+ went to taiping for the grocery errands.

bought some promfet adn skate wings

11 came home. prep meal for boi.

ate lunch. mi hun kuey at about 12ish..

then we went out, wanted to go Hippo cafe, but decided on Botany to change his nappy. thank God for the underground parking sheded from the rain...

walked around until about 2pm.

saw ps hyewon at the library. they also have a youth center cool.

came home. 

cooked maggi and made bubble tea craving

by went to sleep

mama also sleep..

papa played phone.. 

haha waste of time.

but i had two good short naps the previous days when i started work at 2pm covering avi for the night shifts

4pm they woke up.

longest boi has ever slept for the nap. almost 2.5 hours.

we had our dinner together. asam skate.

boi had a 30 minute delay for usual sleep time at 7.30. cause of the long nap this afternoon

8pm he's a sleep

wash up and clean the house

watced Netflix Rebel Moon part 2.

its 10.39pm now. time to sleep

i think it'll be nice to start journalling once again. maybe this set up will work. a phone with a physical keyboard is so much nicer to type than the phone screen

kids nowadays

But yeah, a subtle but interesting observation... As I don't think it just applies to car seating arrangements... But also how parents relationships with children have been morphed over the decades....

Plenty of other examples.

Think: canning, bowing down when walking infront of elders, not disturbing/intruding when adults speak, excusing oneself to pickup a ringing landline phone when eating family dinner, or when leaving the table earlier than others.

Lots of our culture and traditions have changed. For the better or worse? I think yes and no. Yes kids nowadays can speak up more, etc.. but Traits like patience, humility and respect kind of get eroded away by.. pop culture.

Songs on the secular radio mostly promote individualism and materialism.. money.. (Duh uh, that's what the devil wants right, to draw is away from Jesus)...

But yeah.. 

Getting too long the rant. Haha. You get my point.

life 2.0

So the 31st birthday passed by...

Only two friends made it, Jim and his kid..

And avi..

And yeah...

Old..

Rich boss of a died. Stepped on the wrong roof panel and dropped down...

Aj of Queenstown died of cancer...

PS Tim Loh, just had a heart attack during a dinner after giving a sermon at Generations...

Man.. life..

So fragile.

Time is too short.

Live life... To the most

If not now, then when?

Why wait..

no longer I

Having a baby is life changing,

You can no longer live for yourself....

That's...a really big thing btw...

Jesus loves, Jesus was there

If you're currently in a bad situation..

And someone says... There is a way out..

There is a better life waiting for you ahead..

It's tough.

It really is hard to get through.

An unloving mother,

Infertility,

Cancer..

Death of a love one.

What is the other way to say to someone grieving that Jesus loves them and wants them to have a better future...

"He is there with you"

In the darkest moments.

Christ has not forsaken us,

Not even one step of the way...

He was there there whole time.

Jesus knows my every weakness,

Jesus knows my every pain,

My every sacrifice and every shame.

Yet Jesus still choose to stay beside me,

Yet Jesus still choose the cross,

To bear my burden upon Himself,

So that I may freely live in Him.

being healthy

"Being healthy really is the best feeling" -Marcille, DiD Ep9

So I had headaches for the past two days.

It's really horrible... Can't sleep peacefully at night.. can't help around the house... 

Isotonic drinks helped...

Rest helps..

Movement and blood flowing helps...

Finally after two days.. it seems to be better now...

chemical, the horseman

https://youtu.be/uLxFazLK2Mg?si=R6tqyKF0uGnVk5L6

Environmental chemicals will be he harbinger of the end times...

Who can control what chemicals we consume unwillingly..

Mankinds extinction is very real.

And I guess to have more kids.

3 kids would be a good number

stability

As long as...

The government is stable

And the rakyat can live in harmony.

That is something to be thankful for.

baby

 the end of life as we know it

starts wit the beginning of a new one

why the curent gregonian calender?

 new year

i wonder who came u with the idea of the current calender that we're using...

i mean.. the whole world uses Jan Feb - Dec

31, 30, 28 days a month

there are ofcause other calenders out there

being malaysian, you have the fre calenders given out

they have the indian, chinese and also malay calendars there

some follow the moon

some follow.. the stars?

but its amazing to get so so many people to follow ONE time format

its crazy, its like.. the best idea won kinda thing..

like.. mine is soooo good you guys gotta follow it

and fireworks?

to celebrate..

its just a big big sign of display 

unconcious

Is it possible to loose consciousness,

But keep the body moving subconsciously?

the law

1 Timothy 1:8-9

the law is .... an interesting thing.

does it apply to some and not others? or does it apply fairly to everyone. does different interpretations of the law change how the law affects seperate individual of different levels. what is the law? how absolute or relative is it... is the law truth or the way. or is Christ the only Way and Truth. do we make the law greater than Christ in away that we uphold jugment more than forgiveness and grace. don't get me wrong, every action has its consequences to be paid. but who has the right to judge in only not the one whom has paid it all. Christ is the Way.

autonomy SCARF

So there was a session at Resolution,

That talked about losing Autonomy.

It was part of a five acronym word guiding to what makes people .. sad? I can't remember everything. One of it was A for security. sCARF

Man It just came back to memory

The SCARF model involves five domains of human social experience: status, certainty, autonomy, relatedness, and fairness.

And one of it was loss of autonomy.

So... Have you ever felt like.. 

You can't make the deacons you would want to be making due to the current circumstances you're in?

Like.. there's a lack of freedom if you so will....

Freedom to do what you would want to do 

I'm not saying it's necessarily a bad thing 

It can be a good thing..

To be restricted.

A conservative is just a liberal whose been mugged.

Because of who I am, where am I, whom I'm with, what I've done...

There are certain choices we can make and certain some that we can't anymore 

But no regrets...

Just make the decisions

Learn from the mistakes...

And move. On

That's life.

Stuff happens

Things come and goes.

Nothing last forever

But will always be in our memories

lazer

Clarity...

To see things

Thank God for vision

Help us to be less selfish

And think about others more

Waiheke island time

So the lady at Shambala told me something called "island time"...

Where people on the island seem to be in no rush. And they just take time in their own pace

How cool is that.

"Slow down, you're already here"

Is a signboard that I've never seen anywhere else...

And another thing.

The sad story of Dwane protector of the penguins. Who lost to the capitalist.

Even the marine reserve couldn't winnagaisnt the silt caused by piles from the marina..

Owh well.

Such is life

such a good descriptions of KPIs and Metrics

From Blinkist point 3 on the book Capitalist Realism

The paradox of Market Stalinism

We now turn our attention to a phenomenon that epitomizes the paradoxical nature of contemporary economic systems: Market Stalinism. This term is a reflection of the intricate and often contradictory forces at play in our societies – forces that shape both the institutions we interact with and our very perceptions of efficiency and productivity.

Market Stalinism, which might seem oxymoronic at first glance, aptly describes a situation where the market's invisible hand is coupled with an iron fist of administrative control and surveillance. This combination results in an environment where the very forces that are supposed to liberate the market and enhance productivity end up creating new forms of bureaucracy that stifle innovation and creativity. This scenario is vividly portrayed in Mike Judge’s film Office Space, which humorously yet incisively depicts the suffocating nature of the modern corporate setting.

In this environment, workers find themselves inundated with redundant memos and trivial administrative tasks that serve more to demonstrate compliance with procedures than to contribute to any meaningful productivity. In an era often touted for its neoliberal policies – policies like deregulation, privatization, and the emphasis on free-market competition – the reality is a growing complexity and expansion of bureaucratic processes. The relentless push for ongoing evaluations, financial audits, and the measurement of performance through various metrics has given rise to a convoluted administrative maze. In seeking to streamline and optimize, these neoliberal approaches have ironically led to the very inefficiency they aimed to eliminate.

The impact of this phenomenon is not confined to the corporate world alone. It permeates various sectors, including education and public services, where teachers and other professionals are increasingly burdened by the need to satisfy an ever-growing array of performance indicators and targets. These measures, ostensibly designed to improve standards and accountability, often end up diverting resources and attention away from the core activities they’re meant to enhance. In educational settings, for instance, the focus shifts from the actual teaching and learning process to the production and management of data that satisfies bureaucratic requirements.

This scenario leads to what can be described as a culture of bureaucratic anti-production, where the primary output is not goods or services but an endless stream of data and documentation that serves to feed the bureaucratic machine. This culture not only stifles creativity and innovation but also demoralizes those caught in its web, leading to a sense of futility and disengagement. It represents a significant departure from the ideals of efficiency and effectiveness that are often touted as the hallmarks of market economies.

As we ponder this scenario, we should ask ourselves: How can we navigate and reshape these structures to create environments that truly enhance human potential and societal well-being? What new paradigms and approaches are needed to break free from the constraints of bureaucratic anti-production and realize the promise of a more dynamic, responsive, and human-centered system?

zzz

 what am i doing with this life

day after day....

is there anything that changes?

theta state. slipping in the sleepiness

Long sermons in church was good.

People got sleepy..and when your tripping in between the states of consciousness and sleep.. man.. that's the sweet spot..

That's why sleeping in class is good...

That's why Silva talks about it..

That's why the second universal law is about it..

It's not a mystery or unknown..

Sleepy is good..

themes for the year

So the recurring word or intention that has constantly been popping up is...

Authenticity.

What would you do,

If it was really just you?

Our thoughts and actions are so determined and influenced by our surroundings. We constantly think about what others would think about us if we did a certain thing, or not.. 

Resulting in us becoming very passive beings.. it's so much safer than being an active person.

There's no potential for rejection, no room for error. But that's a bad thing. Because humans grow when we make mistakes, that's how we learn. That's how babies learnt to crawl and talk and eat. Just try, if we fail, learn from it, what went wrong, and try again, keep trying until we get it right.

That is the spirit of resilience.

It's okay to fail,

Just... Don't keep doing the same thing and failing over and over again...

Take time to reflect.

When something has gone wrong.

What happened?

Why?

And what can we do better next time,

Especially if a similar situation pops up again.

Secondly,

Value

What do we count hlas being previous to us? This will determine our priorities in life.

The things we place the most value in, is the things that our mind will think about.

It's the things that we'll thinking into the future about. it'll determine the plans we make, the goals we'll achieve. The direction, the compass that points north.

Been watching made in Abyss season 2. And this been popping up.

Value... To each his own he determines what is precious. Something's might be more valuable to others than it would to a stranger. This is because of the intrinsic interaction that one has had with that object or person.

I value time.

I value truth.

I value my family

My wife, my son..

I value... Learning

Growing.

New things,

Presence

Growth.

Love.

Faith

Faithfulness

Grace

Forgiveness

Mercy

Generosity

Purity

Holiness

Life

Happiness

Grief

Pain

There is so much to value.

Too many things in this world,

It would be endless

We just have to choose what we value

In the moment,

In the season

In the time

what would you do if the world was ending?

Carol and the end of the world.

Episode 2. Some ppl in there kind of sums up what NZ Spirit was like.

Spiritual and removed from reality.

The world is ending..

What would you be doing?

Some ppl still find it important to "go to work". I've got a job to do...

And shut down conversations with others...

They hide behind work.

And the part of the toner.

It was like when I went to get firewood for the the central fireplace.

A little too late,

And the buggy had already brought big load. I also took the basket chair from a lady sitting on it...

Owh well.. it's the intention that counts right.

Romans 15:13

our God is the source of all hope. all. every other but of hope in this world... comes from Him. He is the one and only true source of hope... nothing else.. not money, not other religions, nor even our own selves... we might find hope in other things.. but they are all secondary ...  hope comes from God, He is the source of it

fill us with joy and peace. just happiness and having no anxiety, the ability to smile and not worry, not overthink, not be depressed about the world or environment or whatever is around us... it's all in His hands. our lives are in His hands...

as we trust in Him. the most important thing. trust. trust is so important. it's so... critical. every relationship needs trust. trust in the right person, trust is hard to earn, once broken trust is hard to get back, couples trust each other, to tell each other the truth and to support each other when needed... we trust each other to be there... trust God 

overflow with hope. into the lives of those around you. power from the Spirit. the only Spirit that is true. no other spirit in this world deserves a place in our hearts, in our lives. Christ is the master, the Father gives instructions, the Holy Spirit leads us, guides us, promts us on what is right and wrong... follow Chirstm trust him.

then you will know true hope,

true joy and true peace.

father and daughter, toilet door and finger

I went to the Waiheke fairy toilet.

The door smaller on a little girls finger.

I felt some resistance when I was closing the door, I should have pop it open straight away.......

Instead of slamming it.

The father and everyone around was really supportive.. they mentioned that it wasn't my fault over and over again...

I feel so bad tough...

Causing pain, without intention,

Accidentally...

She kept crying  . I couldn't do anything but apologize...

The dad was saying over and over.. don't worry about it. Honestly, he's so nice..

He showed what it is to be a wrong person.

He held her with love. And support.

And calmness...

The little bother kept laughing.. i told him don't put his finger in the door.. learn from his older sister...

Dad said the younger kid put his finger in the car door before... Haha.. I should have continue the convo . But the girl seem to be in So much pain... 

Nothing. I can do . Will buying an ice cream help?

NZ Spirit nye

Christianity is both the easiest and hardest of religions

It's somewhat easy, for us the humans, because all the hard work was done by God. The Trinity has done all the heavy lifting, suffering, and bashing up of Satan when Christ went to confront him and take the keys of hell away... 

All we have to do is.. accept Jesus into our lives as Saviour and Lord... Sounds easy right...

However.. it's not that simple.

Christianity is a monotheistic faith.

Hence, the narrow path.

Unlike practitioners or believers of polytheism, Christians can't worship other gods.

I.e. at the Spirit festival, there are so many cultures.. mostly Hindu (yoga, kritan mantras that repeat the names of Krisna, teachings from the Bahgavad Gitta, the Ohm sign..)... There's Moari, praying to the sky father and earth mother and rivers and sun and moon... There's Druics with their crystals, healing sounds with singing bowls, hand pans and shooting voices, there's Peruvian Macca and Cacao ceremonies... And also LGBT (contraversial topic, needs in depth explanation) There's a whole bunch of worldview there ..

So I would say .. if one is 'okay' with these kind of stuff.. it's 'easy'... Because... Who cares...

You can do anything.. and have no remorse, shame, guilt, conflicting thoughts, cognitive dissonance...

BUT, if you're a strict conservative...

You'll view chanting as... worshipping the devil. You'll view yoga as satanic, the practices as demonic....

Christ guard our minds. All truth is God's.

But it doesn't mean that one's mind cwon't be open to the possibility of other cultures and traditions

Their holy scriptures.. our holy scriptures, our God is so powerful, that all good is His. Just don't worship another god..

The One in us, is greater than the one without..

The drumming, all cultures have a rythm, it's in us as humans, God made us with a beating heart.

The plants and medicine, chemical compounds, DNA, is all made by God. God wrote our genetics, of ever single organism on this world.... Just don't abuse drugs, it destroys... Anything excessive is toxic..

There is a balance.

Find that.

The dance, our bodies made to move.

Cacao ceremony was liberating... In safe space, where you can express to the fullest what you want. Without fear of being judged or looked at weirdly.. cause.. the truth is, everyone is a weirdo in some way, we just don't show it publicly

The meditation sessions, the men's circle, it's stuff you'd do in church. Or a group of ppl your trust. Sharing and being listened to.

The ex-addict spoke about Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, pulling the hand break when we feel the triggers.

The Selenium guy knows Neuro Linguistic Programming... And FMT..  proponent for good guy health... And how excessive supplements (that do help in small amounts) can become toxic

Kritan is really like a group of Christians doing high praise, singing and harmonizing, repeating the four magical chords of G, C, D Em,... Some eventually breaking out spontaneously in tongues, oh but the dance is wildddd

But there's only so much mantras, and repeating on loop for 10 minutes... Simpletons... The mind like simplicity.. it's easy.

Christian songs go are more.. complex. They have meaning and lyrics and such.. (sort not bashing.. ) .. btw I prefer old school Christian songs to new ones....

And holy scriptures, vice verses,