2 samuel 1

"Pain isn't the worst thing. Being hated isn't the worse thing. Being seperated from the one you love isn't the worse thing. The worse thing is failing to deal with reality and becoming disconnected from what is actual. The worse thing is trivialising the honorable, desecrating the sacred...

We don't become mature human beings by getting lucky or cleaver circumventing loss, and certainly not by avoidance and distraction. Learnt to lament. Learn this lamentation..."

- Eugene Peterson

23 Oct 2019

woke up in citiel this morning.
my taikor came over to run a survery for tahlassemia peeps in kota belut.
had a good YA exchange last night, updated each other and was asked to moderate. man i'm so sloppy in this already. mark sent me to the hotel and it was a really good and devine talk. so nice to be able to be beside someone whose going through a similar.. but not same thing.

its not the same. me and her. him and his girl.
but yeah.. God you're not silent.

we are fearful of triggering our other halves. yes we have broken the trust and it might be a loooong time to mend. we need to be patient. show commitment? how would God heal this borkeness and transgression. how does one forgive. it's no a difference in values, its a difference in beliefs.

relationships are built on trust.

then after that picked up crystal from Shell plaza, had breakfast together. was asked if the break in nov for 9 months was going to be a yellow, red or green light.
"taking a break" and "breaking up" are two entirely different things

took a cream for a rash thats been spreading on my right hand's fingers. oiments didn't work on it. Betamethasone does. found out from mark that it's steroids. lol

breakfast with taikor's colleague Norita. suuuper nice lady.

waited for makr to come, around 2pm. sat at borinos. totally missed the post by Dr Colin about there being a fish talk by Casey today, realllly regret not seeing it and informing kok onn about it. cause they both love fish and research so much.

took the car to the mechanic otospa. nice place friendly and cheap. oil change etc. did a general check up RM630+ worth of repairs could be done. but yeah didn't go through with it. should bring jim's car here one day.

by the time it was done it was 5pm. Crystal and i went to Tanjun Lipat to have fruit juices. found out you cant walk from anjun selera to the stalls outside becasue of the fence. sat down, ate chiken wings and the sweetes corn (becasue of two spoonfool of sugar!)

the sun set. no sun set sky too cloudy. took a walk. been talking with crystal much much more nowadays. its so good to have her here beside. the purpose she came here was to spend time together. and if she cant do that, then why stay? fly back to johor? she had to go for dinner with Krys. Abel didn't let me join.. haha.. or well.. advised agaisnt it.. and it was good. it was wise... they manage to have their girl talk. and i think that's really .. really good...

sometimes doing the right thing isn't the easiest or most comfortable thing.

night time. came back. dropped her off. ate dinner with jim at fook fah. went to the gym.
now they've got a new rule: students cant use the pool and gym after 5 pm
the guard came up to me and asked if i was a student..

i looked at time.... (detroit came to my mind)

"tidak saya kerja"

in a lower than usual voice... haha.. maybe it sounded more intimidating? lol

he let me in.

did about 30 minutes worth of weights.. good enough.

came back. shower. chat with crys.
type this blog entry... 10.41pm. barely 30 minutes to recount the whole day!
man this is a much more efficeint way to write a dairy.

probably gonna read something and then head to bed by 11pm.

gonna pick crystal up at 9am tmr! wohoo, its a new day! =D

What do you think?

I think.. That sometimes what I think doesn't have the final say.. But what I think is important too.. Because that's who I am..

I would love to always be able to think what God thinks, and I know that what I think sometimes isn't what God thinks.

Who is a Christian?

1st Harmoni gathering. SIBA, 1B. Ps James

Why do you call yourself a Christian?
What does it mean to be a Christian?
What is following Christ?

Its not just a set of rules, regulations, precepts, tradition...

Its not even a philosophy

Is it a way of life?

It is.... A relationship.

Being born in a Christian family, being used to coming to church, rituals, singing, listening to sermons.. Its all possible without a relationship.

As long as you don't have a relationship with God... Your status as a Christian is... Questionable.

1 tesselonians 1:6

1. A Christian is someone whom is chosen by God.

It is not a human effort. It's not membership, charity, Good works. We can never reach God no matter what we do. Others try to find favour with God, try to please God.... But we can't.. We're not holy, we're sinful, and we'll never reach his benchmark.

Only when God himself reached out to mankind. Is it possible.

The selection is offered to us. As long as we don't choose Him back. It is incomplete. The transection is incomplete.

Offer and acceptance

Many are called, many chosen, but few respond.

2. A Christian is someone whom has responded to the Gospel.

2 Corinthians.. This I pass on to you, Christ died on the cross for our sons, was buried in a tomb and three days later He resurrected.

The core of Christianity.

3. A Christian is someone whom appreciates Christ above everyone and everything else...

Along with the suffering. Along with the hardships.

Our hardships aren't the end of our life. The final destination for our souls have only two places. Eternity with God or eternal separation.

Jesus is the Saviour

Because Jesus died and rose again.
We will follow after him in death and resurrection.

4. A Christian is someone that has a transformed life

They are so different from others.
Because they've repented. And changed from their old ways.  There's evidence of change and difference. You can see it in them. You can feel.

This is a man/lady of substance.

Your life is not like the ways of this world.
We don't party and celebrate like the rest of the people in this world. With alcohol, drugs and

Some people think clubbing is good to release tension and stress that's built up over the week...

But the best way is..
Praise and worship

The question now is.

Do you know God has chosen you.
Can you listen to the Gospel.
What is your response?

Your fragrance will be different.

A Christian is someone whom is
Sold out for Jesus.

Not half hearted. Alang-alang.
Jangan mandi tidak basah.